So your ex dumped you?
She hasn't returned your calls or replied to any messages.
You've done everything that you possibly can to win her back - flowers, cards, gifts, dinners, coffee. You were practically grovelling at her feet. (Big mistake... but that's another story.) She's packed her stuff and has returned you the keys to the house, your jumper (which she used to wear around the house), the goldfish that you two bought at the funfair.
In short, she's given you back everything except your heart.
No fear. At this stage in the game, when the lady says she wants out, she means it. So nothing you do matters. Let the car drive off. Understand that its finally over. Now you're playing a new game called, "Let's Get Even with the Ex."
Here's how you can use your personal blog to make her believe that she might possibly have made the biggest mistake of her entire life. You want to make her believe that she might just have lost the single best thing in their life. The secondary effect that you want to achieve is to seed the idea in her that very possibly she might be the worst thing that could have possibly happend to you. Therefore lowering her heightened sense of self worth.
When a person goes through a very emotional period of their life, their ego and personal needs supercedes all others so your Ex will not have the time to be empathic to your feelings. In fact, she's far more likely to hurl stuff and want to physically hurt you. The best time for you to wreak havoc is when she enters the Cooling Off period.
The tools for psychological warfare is Information. What she doesn't know or thinks she knows will hurt her. The blog is a wonderful device of delivering content designed to misinform and subvert. Why? Firstly, its entirely optional. When you choose to read something, you are more vulnerable. As compared to an SMS or an email, you are forced to receive. But a blog, well, let's say Curiosity Kills the Cat.
Women are drawn to drama. They love the emotional tension. That is your bait. You want to heighten the fears, the delusions, the false images, the wicked impressions. You want to re-establish credibility and appear The Better Man ALWAYS.
There are three phases to the conduct of this war:
Phase 1: Emotional Blackout
That means you don't receive or send any sms, emails, phonecalls or IMs from her. This process should last between 1 week to 10 days.
You want her to stew in her juices. She'll be very very very curious as to how you're dealing with the loss of the Very Important Person that is her.
Do not attempt to blog anything just yet. Just let the Fog of War settle of you and let the confusion grow.
In the mean time conduct a thorough assessment of Oneself.
That means you go over yourself with a fine tooth comb. Get a haircut. Shave. Go to the gym. Work out. Check your finances.
Basically sort your life out. Become a new You. Realise that you were always you and that she has stopped loving you. Its not because you are not acceptable, its just that you two aren't compatible. Accept that and deal with it.
Phase 2: Break Radio Silence
Blog about your new life. Write about your new haircut. The Gym you signed up for. The cute waitress you keep bumping into at the NEW restaurant, cafe, pub you are now frequenting.
Your blog posts should be devoid of any topics about the Ex. In fact, avoid the subject and write about what your life means to you.
DO NOT MOPE. DO NOT BE A BOY ABOUT THINGS.
Nothing you do should make you appear Weak.
Portray sensitivity by writing about feelings and being a first class gentleman about things but be BRAVE and honourable.
Go through life knowing that her life was just a phase. What love the both of you shared is over. It isn't love if either one of you stops wanting to love. She stopped. You kept going.
Good for you. You've just learnt what it means to be a better man.
Phase 3: Prominently Display your Blog Address
Your blog address should be on your MSN and every outgoing email. Create a snare in which she might trip over and be drawn to visit your blog repeatedly out curiosity.
Phase 4: Re-org
Assess the damage. You know she's been had when you detect traffic from her IP address. (Sign up with Extreme Site Tracking to detect visitor traffic.) Check in with frens who are in contact with her.
Your attitude should be one of absolute contempt. When it comes to her feelings, you should be kind and gentle but never affectionate. Be generous but never offer her your new found strength.
The warmth in your voice bleeds out of you when you talk to her.
In conclusion, you would have won the psychological war when you can feel real pity for her.
Why feel pity? Because you are thinking to yourself that your ex will never ever be able to enjoy the good things that you can offer her. You are saving yourself up for someone far more worthy.
My dad used to say that a man should never reward disloyalty. Same rule applies here.
Remember: Men rule the world. Never women. We just pretend they do. Some things in life are entirely within our control.
