You will find plenty of other "gurus" who have gone before willing to help you out - at a price.
Of course it helps if you can think like a corporation, which basically means that you need the same psychological profile as a serial killer. So, examine your conscience. If you can't find one you are ideally equipped for the long and very profitable journey ahead of you.
Research
Now you need to do a little bit of research, but not too much you understand. We wouldn't want you to actually have to do any..gulp!...work.
No, all that's required is for you to Google the term "how to make a million dollars in a week without doing anything". This will throw up several thousand one-page websites, most of which will have a headline something like "How one dirty little secret extracted hundreds of dollars from the idiots reading this and made me rich". Choose any one of these ads, copy it and paste it into one of those bits of software that rewrites everything and anything into something unintelligible.
Don't worry, no-ones going to read the result. Just make sure and certain to change the Clickbank identity to your own. You use Clickbank so that people buying whatever you are selling will become affiliates and sell your product for the 60% commission offered.
Of course, they won't actually make anything, because anyone who buys through them will strip out the affilate's Clickbank ID and insert their own, so that they effectively buy at what they think is a discount. You don't care. This "loss" is factored into your price anyway. All you need to know is that this is a great hidden selling point, which is why you used Clickbank in the first place.
The Product
So what are you going to sell? It doesn't matter. Why not the bit of software you used to rewrite the sales page? Just send it off to a programmer who will charge you about $25 to rebuild it so that it now automatically inserts the latest eBay listings (from which the buyer can make sqillions remember) into every page produced.
The next step is to scour the web for free stuff to give away with your software. Any number of "How to Make a Million" books are available, plus lots of leftover software that nobody's naive enough to buy anymore. Bundle a whole lot together and make them a free offer just so long as the mark....sorry, customer.....buys within a certain time frame. About 30 minutes is long enough. Don't forget to give each item a value and preferably one higher than the cost of the product you are selling.
Pricing
Now an honest person might have trouble pricing this piece of ju....er....software, but not you. Unfortunately you've missed the heyday when $97 was the standard price for anything, and you certainly don't want to waste time on researching the latest popular price. So look, why not use whatever price was at the bottom of that sales page you copied? If it worked for the last guy, it's almost certainly going to work for you. It's probably $39 anyway, reduced from $67 for a short time only.
Marketing
I can practically hear your knees knocking at the sound of the word. C'mon! Have I let you down so far? This is the easiest bit of all. Just join a joint venture organization and offer a commission of 90% of the purchase price to anyone who'll sell it to their email list.
Not only will they fall over themselves to help, they'll provide you with testimonials as well, many of which will start out "Dimplebum Lackwit has done it again!" regardless of the fact that you have never done anything of the sort in your life before. In fact, come to think of it, you can probably just use the ones that are already on your copied page, especially those that describe how the writer made thousands from your software, even though it hasn't been released yet.
The most important thing is this: do not under any circumstances overlook these testimonials, which should be on a yellow background and have a cheesy photo of the "guru" writer staring back out at the reader. These are what truly make you a guru in your own right. It's a commendation. A recognition that you have grasped the fundamentals of extracting hard-earned cash from those who truly believe they can make a load of cash from doing next to nothing.
And why not? Haven't you just demonstrated how easy it really is?
