The internet has no shortage of matchmaking sites. Anyone who has attempted to navigate them knows just how many people there are on those sites, and how hard it is to find a good match. As a man with experience, rotting away though I may be, here's some advice. Hopefully it can save you some trouble in your search for a soul mate.
First and foremost, anyone with the number 69 in their user name isn't a keeper. If anything, its a guarantee that the person in question is a sex-crazed teenager looking for a new play thing, a middle aged man who thinks blatant sexual references are a sure fire way to attract women, or someone who just plain has a lot of growing up to do before they are ready for a serious relationship. Additionally, I'd like to point out that this comes along with a 60% chance that the person is overweight. You should also avoid names such as "Hawtblonde," "Sexygrrrl," and any name that references body parts.
The next thing to watch out for -and this is a big one- is people who use constant abbreviations instead of full words. I know it's all the rage amongst the younger crowd, but if you receive a message that says "ur pic is hawt u r a qt" you might want to start looking somewhere else for a mate. Adults use real words to communicate. If they can't communicate like an adult, they aren't ready for an adult relationship. There is one exception to this rule: brief messages coming from a cell phone are acceptable. Typing full words on one of those things can be infuriating, but I'm talking brief messages. You want to communicate with your cell phone? Dial the number and make the call, stop the texting foolishness and leave the abbreviations to the 14-year-old girls. God help them if they say an abbreviation out loud instead of speaking the full words. People who do that deserve to be smacked.
Once you meet that special someone and you start spending some time together, there is one last thing to keep an eye out for. If all you ever seem to talk about is sex, chances are they aren't looking for anything else from you. They may not be willing to admit it to themselves, but the chances of it turning into something more meaningful is slim, especially after you start having sex. It isn't impossible to salvage this sort of relationship, but it's going to take a lot of effort, so be sure they are worth it.
It can take a lot of effort to find someone worth pursuing a meaningful relationship with. It's important to remember that not everyone is looking for the same thing you are, and not everyone really knows what they are looking for. It's okay to meet up with Hawtblonde77 or bigJohnson69 from time to time for a good time, but it's important to remember that a good time is likely all they are looking fro from you. Heed my advice, and you might just find yourself a keeper.
Until next time, braaiiins...
